There is the same pattern I witness far too often in parents. I teach Kids Yoga so I’m around children and their parents a lot. I kind of act as a healer/ energy shifter/ yoga teacher in my classes. Right now I have a small boy and his mother attending my classes and learning to heal their connection. He doesn’t want to listen or do anything she says and thinks it’s funny. He has been told “no thank you”, and “No” far too many times for the amount of time he’s been in my presence in the class by his mom. She is frustrated, and I gently encourage her herself to do the yoga practice with us as a good example instead of trying to force him to do it….So anyways I wanted to talk about the dynamic of energy. Many parents don’t realize they are creating the defiance within their children. All rebellion and non listening is due to the fact that the parent is disconnected from the source of love and they have an agenda to get their kids to do what they want. And that wanting might be something very good for their child, BUT if the parent is not connected, the child sences it and wants to do the opposite of whatever the parent tells them to because the demand is coming from them wanting the child to do it instead of inviting the child to consider the fun or benefit of whatever is being offered. Children fallow LOVE. I will repeat, children only fallow Love, they don’t like anger, they don’t like it when parents demand and act pushy. They are human beings too right, no one likes that energy. Who wants to be told what to do and how to do it from someone who they themselves are stressed within? So the key parents is to be able to identify your inner state of being. Notice where your coming from when you communicate something with you child. Are you coming from anxiety, like “oh no, oh no, stop doing that, now do this, cause thats what you suppose to be doing!” It’s so sad because when your in anxiety about your child’s behavior and you try to get them to stop doing what their doing and shift into a better place we actually make them do more of what their doing and make things worse, if we ourselves don’t shift our energy first. It really depends on our OWN internal state that determines your child’s ability to listen to you. Interesting right? Now when you find yourself with a defiant child laughing about the situation is good 🙂 It really is hilarious sometimes, right? And laughing when nothing goes your way is a good idea, and is an energy kids Love too, everyone loves to laugh. Never take anything seriously. Everything is energy and your either aware of your energy and how your affecting your external situation/ the people around you/ your child, or your completely not, But I know you want to be…Thats why I woke up in the middle of the night to write this. I want to help parents to realize how their affecting their children based on their level of energetic awareness, or we say level of consciousness. The more aware you are the better parent you are. It’s all about energy awareness and knowing what works and what doesn’t. What doesn’t work is abiding in a state of Stress, Anxiety, Anger, Fear, Embarrassment, etc…I’m so sorry I wish your stress could communicate clearly to your children to stop and listen, but it just makes them want to get as far away form you as possible. And who could blame them? Just look at yourself when your in these states…right?
So, I’ve created a tool to help you learn to shift your energetic state and begin leading your child with ease and grace…its called S.T.O.P.
S- Is for Stop. Stop yourself when your in any state other than Loving and Happy. Just STOP doing everything. Period.
T- Now TAKE a deep Breath. The T is for TAKE A DEEP BREATH into your belly a few times.
O- is for OBSERVE. Now OBSERVE where your at. Imagine you could float above your head and look at your mind and emotions and energetic state, physical state too and your child’s…Just simply OBSERVE without any judgement. Be the witness to you mind and body and the situation. Step out of your head and Observe, thats it.
P-Now the P is for your new Perspective on Peace…You Ask yourself….. “What can I do in this moment to create more Love and Peace”?
And Viola! Now you have an opening for spirit to give you an insight and inspiration to start creating a closer connection and Love between you and your child. Sometimes the solution is to just breath and be silent for a few moments, then gently place a hand on their shoulder, or maybe some words of what you could say to help your child feel loved might come through…
No one can tell you how to parent correctly, what to say. how to discipline correctly or whatever. Only YOU have the answers to what is the right thing to do in any given moment. And S.T.O.P. Is a little tool to get you reconnected to your center and respond with awareness and love. Isn’t that beautiful?!
Enjoy those babies, and put S.T.O.P. in your head somewhere to pull out when your off!
p.s. Two Conscious Parenting Classes are beginning this week. One on Sat night at beginning oct. 3rd 5:30pm-7 at Yoga Squared in Tustin https://www.facebook.com/events/1668486580061694/and the other at The Yoga Mat in Orange on Tuesday nights at 7pm-8:30pm beginning Oct. 6th https://www.facebook.com/events/1145805032101981/
See Video explaining courses here! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJ6AdMcMEws